4.05.2009

Holy Week

Lent has been a challenge for me this year. I had no idea what to "give up". I don't have a lot of spare amusements--I keep to a limited blogroll and carefully-chosen fiction. The last several years have left me so far behind on sleep that I don't dare cut into what I get now, and at twenty pounds underweight it hardly seemed good to do anything that involved cutting calories.

So I gave up time--one of the hardest things, right now, for me to let go of. I am trying to rebuild my once-unshakeable habit of reading the Bible and praying every day--something I did very, very faithfully from age nine to age 27, and only in spurts since. True, I've improved gradually in the last year or two; the daily Mass readings on podcast were helpful for a long time, but I've also tried to cut down on the headphones at work, so it's back to the good old hard copy. The paper publishing industry may be going down in flames right now, but I do believe I'll always prefer to hold books in my hand to reading them onscreen or having them read out to me.

For the week leading up to Easter, though, I think laying aside the blogroll would be wise for me (making an exception for Silhouette, of course, which I am about to be required to post, read, and comment upon). It's too easy for me to cheat on my limits, to waste time reading long stretches of comments that mostly bore me or make me angry, and it's naturally addictive. It has also been difficult for me to give God His portion of my direct attention unbegrudgingly--I've gotten that jealous of my time--and maybe a week off the internet will help me with my willingness. Because I haven't forgotten that I love Jesus. I just hate being busy.

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